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By: Cashew, Brian Ross
Sep 02 2007 11:20pm
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Johnny

Spike

Timmy

Vorthos

The 10 Missing Puzzle Pieces as seen by Johnny

I don't quite know who designed Master's Edition, but I can tell you a few things they did wrong and why.  For instance, on what sick planet does a man hand you High Tide and not Palinchron.  It's as if the designer sent down obvious combo cards only to deny their masterful partner - utterly sick.  While this does open up the delicious chance to make newer and more fun combos, it'd be nice to have the old staples back in our pocket.  I don't want to bore you too much with my ramblings so I'll get straight to the point - the top 10 cards missing from Master's Edition:

Top Missing Combo Cards from Master's Edition

Let me preface my list with the fact that by design Palinchron, Goblin Lackey and Crystalline Sliver could not be included. This is due to the fact that they are post-Alliances.  That being said - when exactly will they be put online if not during the Master's Edition?  The implication seems to be that Mirage, Tempest, Urza, and Masques blocks will all be retrosetted (well in the case of Mirage finished) so they won't be included in Masters.  This also seems to imply that all the pre-Alliances sets will not be retrosetted.  Also, it did hurt to leave the Dual Lands off my list, but we have comparable cards online and ultimately they are merely just better mana makers - can't do much with them.   

Life isn't always about explaining choices to players who can't comprehend so instead let me simply show you why I chose these cards:

1. Stasis

Vintage: Unrestricted
Legacy: Unrestricted

Turbostasis - Historical Deck

Spells (36)

4x Arcane Denial
4x
Boomerang
4x Force of Will
4x
Howling Mine
4x Lim Dul's Vault
4x Stasis
3x Kismet
2x Despotic Scepter
2x
Feldon's Cane
1x Balance
1x Black Vise
1x Ivory Tower
1x Recall
1x Zuran Orb

Lands (24)

12x Island
4x City of Brass
2x Adarkar Wastes
2x Land Cap
2x River Delta
2x
Underground River

And if this can't be improved even further, I'll be a Mogg's Uncle.  If I had to pin down the birth of the Johnny player to one place it'd be with Stasis - the Rubic's Cube of Magic.

2. Reset

Vintage: Unrestricted
Legacy: Unrestricted

You understand Early Harvest correct?  Reset is like Early Harvest, but woo boy can it be more fun.  Especially now that, Teferi, Mage of Zhalfir dominates in Blue.  And who can forget about Reset at the mention of High Tide - Reset was often the cornerstone of High Tide decks.

3. Bazaar of Baghdad

Vintage: Unrestricted
Legacy: Banned

Manaless Ichorid - Vintage Power Deck

Creatures (28)
4x Golgari Grave-Troll
4x Golgari Thug
4x Ichorid
4x Narcomoeba
4x Stinkweed Imp
4x Street Wraith
2x Flame-Kin Zealot
2x Sutured Ghoul

Lands (8)
4x Bazaar of Baghdad
4x Dryad Arbor

Spells (24)
4x Bridge from Below
4x Cabal Therapy
4x Chalice of the Void
4x Dread Return
3x Leyline of the Void
3x Serum Powder
2x Dragon Breath

So broken, that even it's namesake Magus of the Bazaar is broken. Gotta love how much havoc it can create even with no basic mana support from lands!

4. Library of Alexandria

Vintage: Restricted
Legacy: Banned

Ahh, Wisdom decks are a thing to bemarvelled. Beyond the sheer marvel of a free card, this deck promotes an entire concept in deck building - why play all your cards when you can hold onto seven and still dominate. How cool would Owling Mine look with Libraries in it?

5. Palinchron

Vintage: Unrestricted
Legacy: Unrestricted

I don't need to say anything besides High Tide + Palinchron.  Really I don't.

6. Illusionary Mask

Vintage: Unrestricted
Legacy: Banned

Masknaught Bomberman - Vintage Power Deck

Creatures (9)
4x Trinket Mage
3x Phyrexian Dreadnought

2x Auriok Salvagers

Lands (16)
4x Flooded Strand
4x Island
4x Tundra
1x Library of Alexandria
1x Plains
1x Polluted Delta
1x Tolarian Academy

Spells (35)
4x Brainstorm
4x Counterspell 

4x Force of Will
3x Illusionary Mask
2x Stifle
2x Thirst for Knowledge
1x AEther Spellbomb
1x Ancesterall Recall
1x Black Lotus
1x Echoing Truth
1x Gifts Ungiven
1x Merchant Scroll
1x Mox Emerald
1x Mox Jet
1x Mox Pearl
1x Mox Ruby
1x Mox Sapphire
1x Pithing Needle
1x Sensei's Divining Top 

1x Sol Ring
1x Time Walk
1x Tormod's Crypt

7. Time Vault

Vintage: Unrestricted
Legacy: Unrestricted

Do you smell that?  I smell combo.  I'm hiding this one.  A good player doesn't share all his tricks and boy oh boy is this a big one. (Editor's Note:  Time Vault has at least been fixed to where it is not automatic kill with a certain red card from Ravnica: City of Guilds.  If anyone remembers when Flame Fusillade was about see play they will also remember the large amount of skies falling from certain tournament players.  -JXC)

8. Fork

Vintage: Unrestricted
Legacy: Unrestricted

Some combos are simple, some combos are powerful.  This card is both simple and powerful, making any spell an instant combo.  Fork is a vastly important card whose potential for abuse is astounding. 

9. Crystalline Sliver

Vintage: Unrestricted
Legacy: Unrestricted

While this more or less just a grand ability, it represents an extreme power level rise in the Sliver army.  Shroud is a powerful effect on a single creature, but on an entire army .... my oh my. Now for a historic deck that could obviously be improved by a few cards from Time Spiral.

Counter Sliver - Historical Deck

Creatures (12)
4x Crystalline Sliver
4x Muscle Sliver
4x Winged Sliver

Lands (24)
8x Island
4x Brushland
3x Plains
2x Adarkar Wastes
2x Skyshroud Forest
1x City of Brass
1x Forest
1x Reflecting Pool
1x Thran Quarry
1x Wasteland

Spells (24)
4x Counterspell
3x Brainstorm
3x Disenchant
3x Portent
3x Worship
2x Cursed Scroll
2x Legacy's Allure
2x Mana Leak
2x Power Sink

10. Goblin Lackey

Vintage: Unrestricted
Legacy: Unrestricted

Goblins- Legacy Power Deck

Creatures (26)
4x Goblin Lackey
4x Goblin Matron
4x Goblin Piledriver
4x Goblin Recruiter
4x Mogg War Marshal
3x Goblin Warchief
2x Goblin Sharpshooter
1x Tin Street Hooligan

Spells (7)
4x AEther Vial
2x Pyroblast 

1x Black Lotus
1x Mox Ruby

Lands (19)
6x Mountain
4x Bloodstained Mire
4x Taiga
4x Wooded Foothills
1x Strip Mine

Much like Crystalline Sliver, Lackey may not be the most overwhelmingly complex card, but his straightforward power level has definitely kept the Goblin tribe a crowd favorite.  It's hard to imagine that in a tribe where Heroes are crap, that a simple Lackey performs so well.

There may be more potent combo pieces out there that I didn't identify, but I felt these to be so staple and iconic that they deserved to come online.  Some cards didn't make it simply because they weren't really combo cards such as - Capsize.  Overall, these are my favorite combo cards and if you can't at least agree on Stasis giving birth to the first Johnny maybe we're on the wrong the page.

- Until next time Johnny Out!

 


 

 The Top 10 Missing Pieces of Power by Spike

I hope you skipped all that Johnny crap and came straight down here, because when it comes to Magic, it's all about winning.  I'm not saying I win all the time, but every dog has his day.  My decks are powerful, and as such the cards I wanted to see on Master's Edition were as well.  Sadly I saw Force of Will.  What kind of crap was that?  Almost every other card was a radiating piece of turd.  Anyway, here's what is missing, obviously.

Top 10 Missing Things from Master's Editions

  1. Power Nine
  2. Dual Lands
  3. Power Artifacts: Mox Diamond, Lotus Petal, Sol Ring, Mana Crypt
  4. Bazaar of Baghdad
  5. Goblin Lackey
  6. Tolarian Academy
  7. Free Blue: Misdirection, Gush, Daze 
  8. Power Tutors: Imperial Seal, Demonic Tutor
  9. Yawgmoth's Will
  10. Power Land Destruction: Wasteland, Sinkhole, Strip Mine 

As you can see my list is just the best cards in Magic - minus Force of Will.   If you have a problem with that, maybe you should just quit the game - games are meant to be won not lost, and I'm tired of not having the appropriate power online to match my skill.  I don't care if they even make them tourney win non-tradeable cards, as I plan on winning everything I enter, obviously.  Now, I've been told I I can't just write "Obviously" next to each selection to explain it, so I'll try to tell you as simple as I can why these cards are good and why they need to be online.

1. Power Nine
Time Walk, Time Twister, Ancestral Recall, Black Lotus, Mox Diamond, Mox Pearl, Mox Ruby, Mox Emerald, Mox Jet

Vintage: Restricted
Legacy: Banned

Obviously.  If you don't know this, don't waste my time.  It's not called the Power Nine because it's mother said it was.  The only problem is it's restricted, making it lame - I have four Lotuses out of principle - one day they'll unrestrict it.

2. Dual Lands 
Badlands, Bayou, Plateau, Savannah, Scrubland, Taiga, Tropical Island, Tundra, Underground Sea, Volcanic Island

Vintage: Unrestricted
Legacy: Unrestricted

While I generally wish I didn't have to play land, as I find the whole one per turn thing a little restrictive - God hasn't blessed me with being able to play 4x Moxen and 4x Lotus yet.  Basic lands are silly and weak, why play a basic land when Dual Lands do the same thing better at no extra cost.  I guess if they won't give me my Power Nine, I'll settle for these Dual Lands.

Power Artifacts
Mox Diamond, Lotus Petal, Sol Ring, Mana Crypt, Mana Vault

Vintage: Restricted
Legacy: Sol Ring, Mana Crypt, and Mana Vault Banned - Mox Diamond and Lotus Petal unrestricted

This makes up for the Moxes and Lotuses being restricted.  Unfortunately often I can only play 1 of these each - "Le Sigh".  Oh well, as long as they keep printing awesome cards like these I'll put them in here one card at a time.  Oh yeah, don't put that Lotus Bloom on my table. I should be at game over status before that hits anyway. 

picture of Mana Crypt

4. Bazaar of Baghdad

Vintage: Unrestricted
Legacy: Banned

Two good cards for three cards I don't want anymore.  I like the sound of that.  The Magus cycle of Time Spiral was weak in comparison, I prefer my coffee straight black so I'll pass on your Magus of the Bazaar as well.  And I laugh in the face of Leyline of the Void,  just like with Chalice of the Void you can't stop my domination, you can only slow it down for a little bit.

5. Goblin Lackey

Vintage: Unrestricted
Legacy: Unrestricted

I almost didn't play this card at first because it names implies weakness.  However it's performance implies perfection.  Normally I wouldn't run Siege-Gang Commander, but with lil' feller in the fray, I often play my Commander on Turn TWO and finish the game up lickety split.   They should rename him Key Goblin Lock - as he locks all my games in as wins. Can I trademark that?

6. Tolarian Academy

Vintage: Restricted
Legacy: Banned

While normally I try to shy away from combo cards, Tolarian Academy fits so well with all my Moxen and mana makers.  So it's like a double whammy.  You can keep your Island, I'll play something worth my time.

7. Free Blue
Misdirection, Gush, Daze 

Vintage: Unrestricted
Legacy: Gush banned, Misdirection and Daze unrestricted

Too often, I find that playing cards relies on mana.  That's why I like these cards and Force of Will.  I mean come on, just cause I don't have mana available doesn't mean I shouldn't be able to do stuff.  Fear the unknown - actually scratch that - fear me.

8. Power Tutors
Imperial Seal, Demonic Tutor

Vintage: Restricted
Legacy: Banned

Okay, short and sweet. I likes what I have and I wants what I want.  Getting what I want, when I want makes me happy, which should make you sad.  And I'm sorry, but that Diabolic Tutor is a piece of balanced crap, 4 mana is 2 mana too many for me.  Although I have to admit that new art is wicked nice.

9. Yawgmoth's Will

Vintage: Restricted
Legacy: Banned

I find it funny that Yawgmoth's Will and my Will are usually one in the same.  I don't consider what I do evil, I consider it good as I'm the better player - sort of like Manifest Destiny - I am meant to win.  Playing every card in my graveyard again including my Lotus is very special and nice.  If you don't understand why this card is good, well, I feel for you.

10. Power Land Destruction
Wasteland, Sinkhole, Strip Mine 

Vintage: Strip Mine restricted, Sinkhole and Wasteland unrestricted
Legacy: Strip Mine banned, Sinkhole and Wasteland unrestricted

Land Destruction.  I don't get why people cry about it.  C'est la vie.  It's your fault for relying on lands.  Oh yeah, also while not the most powerful deck ever this deck is way awesome and wouldn't be possible without these cards.

Rogue Deadguy Ale: A Homebrew - Legacy Deck 
by Chris Pikula

Creatures (11)
4x Dark Confidant
4x Hypnotic Specter
3x Nantuko Shade

Lands (23)
10x Swamp
4x Bloodstained Mire
4x Scrubland
4x Wasteland
1x Tainted Field

Spells (36)
4x Dark Ritual
4x Duress
4x Hymn to Tourach
4x Sinkhole
4x Vindicate
2x Cursed Scroll
2x Engineered Plague
2x Gerrard's Verdict

Well that's it.  I promised short and sweet, I hope you understand my choices, as all of that was obvious to me and should have been to you as well.  I look forward to pounding you over and over with or without these cards.  See ya in the next tourney!


 The Top 10 Missing Face Smashers owned by Timmy

Hey, hey, Timmy here. While I admire a lot of the cards they put into Master's Edition - Polar Kraken & Hand of Justice woot woot - I still wanted more.  Yeah, go figure me wanting more.  There are so many cool cards out there that I've never been able to really play with and I'll be darned if I don't feel like a kid on Christmas and I got a Go-Bot instead of a Transformer.   I tried to narrow it down to 10 cards I really, really, really wanted and I think I did a good job.  I mean give me any one these cards in a game and I'll own you.

The Top 10 Missing Face Smashers Melters Pwners

I um, don't know what to put in this space.  My list owns. Nuff' Said.  

1. Chaos Orb

Vintage: Banned
Legacy: Banned

Hahaha this card is the best ever.  You throw it in the air and things blow up, there's no better way to whack some creatures.  I have mad throwing skillz that trump whatever you can make.  Phear the Orb. I'm not sure what a Mono Artifact is, but I caught Mono from your sister once. Actually it's probably better this card isn't online, as my mad throwing skillz would be tainted by an obviously subpar program.

2. Demonic Hordes

Vintage: Unrestricted
Legacy: Unrestricted

Lolz Demons!  They're also 5/5 and can smash some serious face ...or I can spend the rest of the game melting your lands into the graveyard before sending 3000 creatures at you.  I really wish I had this card cause Stone Rain is Sofa King We Tar Did compared to it.

3. Minion of Leshrac

Vintage: Unrestricted
Legacy: Unrestricted

Haha, another 5/5 Demon!  This one is kinda crappy because I have to feed it cattle.  Luckily it can whack creatures too!  Also it's a fricking bat, how cool is that.  

><>('-')<>< )))))))) 
Check out those leet bat shock waves. That's your face getting melted by my bat.

4. Ali from Cairo

Vintage: Unrestricted
Legacy: Unrestricted

Ali isn't really the best card ever because he's a wussy 0/1.  However I don't lose so hahahaha, that means I have to win.  Frigging Genie said it best:

"Prince Ali!
Mighty is he!
Ali Ababwa
Strong as ten regular men, definitely!
He faced the galloping hordes
A hundred bad guys with swords
Who sent those goons to their lords?
Why, Prince Ali"

5. Mind Twist

Vintage: Unrestricted
Legacy: Banned

The ultimate in hand owning.  Guess what - Dark Ritual + Dark Ritual + Dark Ritual + Mind Twist = you pwnt.  Best part is that art matches what the last guy I owned with Mind Twist did.  He cried and threw a tantrum too, hilarious - True Story!

6. Old Man of the Sea

Vintage: Unrestricted
Legacy: Unrestricted

Hmm, I've never read a book by Ernest Hemingway, but his card rocks! If his books are anything like the card I'll have to check one out after I finally finish this Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows book.  I wonder if people get pwned in that book too.  Anyway, this card is great because - your creatures are now my bat food LOL.

7. Shahrazad

Vintage: Unrestricted
Legacy: Unrestricted

This card well, I loves it.  Why?  Because I can own you in a big ole two for one.  It's twice the beating in the same seating - roflcopter I rhymed.  It's a mom and a daddy joke wrapped in one! Twofer! NICE!!

8. Rocket Launcher

Vintage: Unrestricted
Legacy: Unrestricted

Need I say more?  Oh yeah. I do -- BOOOOOOOM RIP MOFO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Your arse got blownt.

9. Marjhan

Vintage: Unrestricted
Legacy: Unrestricted

One Fish, Two Fish, Red Fish, Big Giant Glowing Lantern Face Melting Fish.  It's eating a whale, and soon enough it'll be eating your mom.  Haha, here ya go for that one:

           ROFL:ROFL:LOL:
              ____^____
          _/         []   |   |

LOL== _                |__| 
            |__________]
                     I    I
                 ------------/

(Editor's note:  In case you have no idea what this is, it is a ROFLcopter.  You can giggle now.)

10. Nafs Asp

Vintage: Unrestricted
Legacy: Unrestricted

Haha, get it?  Say it faster. Get it now?  Nice Asp.  I wanted to make my infamous Chub Toad, Bone Flute, Nafs Asp deck.  Lollerskates!  Best card ever.  Chub Toad.

Lol, hope you enjoyed my awesome cards.  Until I get these awesome cards, I'll be owning fools and stomping all you $1000 deck crybabies with my massive fatties online.  Catch ya later.  Chub Toad.


 The Top 10 Missing Flavors as decreed by Vorthos 

 

The Top 10 Missing FlavorsI

  1. Unholy Strength
  2. King Suleiman
  3. Dwaven Weaponsmith
  4. Adventurers' Guildhouse
  5. Blood of the Martyr
  6. Thallid
  7. Kjeldoran Frostbeast
  8. Feroz's Ban
  9. Agent of Stromgald

I wanted to let you know that this list is in order of basic set release not by power or anything.  My goal wasn't to identify the Top 10, but merely a representative card from each set. Cards that were important flavor and art wise.  Cards that meant something more than a card to be thrown away when something better was released. Afterall, in the end, without a story and a flow, the game is merely just a game.  These cards helped create the Magic Multiverse and as such should be honored by being brought online.  

 

1. Invisibility

Vintage: Unrestricted
Legacy: Unrestricted

Representing the early core sets - Alpha, Beta, Unlimited I chose Invisibility.  To me Invisibility represents the largest mistake in card removal for the release of Revised.  While the other cards were too confusing or too powerful, this card being removed began the trend of walls being neglected in decks.  Early on there were many walls, today the term is almost defucnt as the entire concept was proven to be less than competitve.  Perhaps if Magic had included more cards like this Walls might still be alive and well in the game beyond the occasional Wall of Roots.

2. Unholy Strength

Vintage: Unrestricted
Legacy: Unrestricted

The orginial Unholy Strength to me depicts an era of Magic where the world was at it's heels.  The flavor isn't overwhelming, but the burning pentagram became a poster child against the game.  In fact, I remember the day I opened a pack and saw just a guy looking like he was stretching - no pentagram in sight.  The odd part about the card though, is that even with the pentagram in the picture it's a poor picture.  I mean look at the Pentagram's top and bottom portion - they don't match.  The loss and then return of the pentagram years later signified Magic's aging process.

I chose this card for it's historical impact on Wizards of the Coast. Representative of the first true second edition of the core set - Revised.

3. King Suleiman

Vintage: Unrestricted
Legacy: Unrestricted

Flavor-wise in a story rife with Arabian mythology, King Suleiman (or Solomon as known in the bible) is a masterful choice for a de-emphasis card.  Historically, he's split between being a wise ruler and being a master of demons especially Djinni.  While his ability should be more in the realm of controlling Efreets, Djinn, and Demons due to his Keys and Seal, it's not out of scope that he could destroy them. 

The designers showed impeccable attention to detail in using Suleiman over Solomon as Suleiman is the Arabic form of Solomon.  Overall a masterfully designed card.

4. Dwarven Weaponsmith

Vintage: Unrestricted
Legacy: Unrestricted

Gut ong azul, ut Dawi gurgon un grong un grund af karak makaz un klad.

If you understand the previous phrase, you already know why this card has perfect flavor and ability.  Birthed from the earth, the Dwarves toil and strive for their works.  The Dwarven Weaponsmith creates grand weapons that can empower any creature to new heights. In case, you want to know the phrase is Dwarven for "One piece of metal is all us Dwarves need to forge the finest weapon or armor." Although that doesn't quite as impressive in commonspeak, the concept of a Dwarf in a land full of metal is impressive.

5. Adventurers' Guildhouse

Vintage: Unrestricted
Legacy: Unrestricted

I can just imagine the Heroes of Legends gathering in a Guildhouse.  Merrily drinking ale, a bard begins to sing a gaelic verse of past adventures and the heroes who led them.

Gur sinniodh linn crithre corphort
d'fírrinn mo mheór bhfrithirghrod,
go tirim tiuighdhéantach trom
sileach cruitmhéarach cothrom.

Tabhair mo lann go n-áille
am dhorn daithgheal deasláimhe
go ccuirinn treasfhaobhar teann
ar a glantaobhaibh timcheall.

So that I have played sparkling melodies
with the tips of my eager rapid fingers,
with notes clean, closely linked, grave,
nimble, hard-fingered, even.

Place my beautiful blade
in my fair right hand,
that I may put a firm battle-edge
upon its shining sides all round.

As the fire wanes and the revelery dies down, a bloodied peasant staggers in begging for help.  Quickly the heroes gather and set out.  A new journey has begun.

6. Blood of the Martyr

Vintage: Unrestricted
Legacy: Unrestricted

This card's artwork is probably the most evocative card in Magic.  The forlorn yet stalwart gaze of the eyes, the gentle tears of blood flowing down the face, and the pure absence of context engage the viewer.  This is artwork at best, any more or any less and it's magical embrace would be ruined.  I'd hate to see even her mouth as it'd change the entire feel of the card.

I'd appreciate it if you could stop reading now.  Just for a moment.  Gaze into the eyes and let the feeling run over you.  Then continue on, if you have the strength.

7. Thallid

Vintage: Unrestricted
Legacy: Unrestricted

Now I know what you're saying, and please don't let me stop you from saying it - Thallid is online.  However, the proper artwork isn't.  While I appreciate the H.R. Giger feel to the current Timeshifted in Thallid, I've always found this one to evoke the fusion of a fungus and saproling more fluidly.  Also, Fallen Empires is infamous for it's numerous multiple arts on cards, so it'd only make sense to bring on some multiple artwork to express the set. 

I've heard many say that deckbuilding is an artform.   If that is true, then it's necessary to have the right cards for your pallette and this is the proper Thallid.

8. Kjeldoran Frostbeast

Vintage: Unrestricted
Legacy: Unrestricted

Ah the Kjledoran Frostbeast, such a creature to behold.  Fearsome and chilling to the spine, the Kjeldoran Frostbeast is the perfect representation of a set defined by the cold.  How does one fight the cold without dieing?  One really doesn't.  A chilling incarnation, most creatures who come into contact with the Frostbeast will not survive.  A testament to the harsh setting of the Ice Age set.

 

9. Feroz's Ban

Vintage: Unrestricted
Legacy: Unrestricted

Feroz's Ban is a beautiful card that represents the Homelands set quite well.  It  eloquantly expresses Feroz's hatred of summoning creatures - especially sentient ones.  While the ban is in reality a forcefield around an entire plane, I find this image very symbolic of it.  It seems to depict that Feroz alone is responsible for keeping the plane of Ulgortha safe, which is only compounded by the flavor text.

Plot-wise the card's ability makes sense, as with the death of Feroz the barrier began to weaken and allow creatures and planewalkers to enter once again, albiet with difficulity.

10. Agent of Stromgald

Vintage: Unrestricted
Legacy: Unrestricted

The story of the Ice Age block is in essence the story of good versus evil, as is almost always the case in Magic.  What made this story particurally interesting is the amount subterfuge and treachery that occurs.  An ex-Knight of Stromgald Lim-Dül lead by Tvesh Stat and Leshrac, raises an undead army from the former Knights of Stromgald including their former namesake Marton Stromgald. Using Marton to rally the remaining living Knights against Kjledor they even manage to wrest away Generald Varchild. 

This card depicts that treachery.  A seemingly Red creature that changes mana to Black depicts how the Agent is while seemingly fighting for Kjeldor and Balduva in reality working to help Stromgald and Lim-Dül.  I was a little distraught when I saw the card's flavor text accidentally upon the set's first release as I was still in the throes of "The Gathering Dark" which was masterfully written by Jeff Grubb.  Luckily I had forseen most of the treachery and I trudged on at this inconvience.

 


 

Hopefully, you enjoyed this stereotypical look into some of the missing cards from Master's Editions.  I await the harsh rebuttal from all the disagreeing players of all types.  Bring it on.

0 Comments

by Anonymous (Unregistered) 75.126.210.114 (not verified) at Fri, 09/07/2007 - 05:30
Anonymous (Unregistered) 75.126.210.114's picture

I think you needed an intro.

by Anonymous (Unregistered) 24.29.86.132 (not verified) at Thu, 09/06/2007 - 13:16
Anonymous (Unregistered) 24.29.86.132's picture

I disliked everything about this article.

The ridiculous caricatures you use are way too hoary to be funny. Hell, I didn't know this was intended to be comedy until you said something about what "good comedy does."

http://youtube.com/watch?v=X551IPFcA_8

no need by mtgotraders at Tue, 09/04/2007 - 15:59
mtgotraders's picture

Lets keep these comments a little more constructive here guys.  There is a nice way to say things and there is a nice way to say things.. Nuff said.

by elrogos at Tue, 09/04/2007 - 19:11
elrogos's picture

totally agree with the anonimous before me... and after that, it was so long and boring... Sad about it cause i've found your latter article very amusing and interesting.

by Anonymous (Unregistered) 74.214.249.213 (not verified) at Tue, 09/04/2007 - 14:36
Anonymous (Unregistered) 74.214.249.213's picture

i didn't like the article.. mostly because it wasn't serious and mostly offensive and not funny.. there is a fine line between "maddox" offensive funny and just being offensive.. i thought I was going into something that would actually have some kind of thought and intellegence behind it.. but instead it was some wonky grid layout with funky colors and just really bad stereotyping and had absolutely no inherent value behind it.. I guess I just missed the bus..

 in terms of MED none of the cards are released yet so really, no one knows how its going to affect it.. I would have liked it better with a straight man (like someone actually writing a "real" article) and then the characters showing up talking about top 10.. the best way i can describe this is look at how MaRo writes an intereview article (like the one for vampire week comes to mind)

Quoted for Truth by Cashew at Mon, 09/03/2007 - 09:14
Cashew's picture

"Let me preface my list with the fact that by design Palinchron, Goblin Lackey and Crystalline Sliver could not be included. This is due to the fact that they are post-Alliances.  That being said - when exactly will they be put online if not during the Master's Edition?  The implication seems to be that Mirage, Tempest, Urza, and Masques blocks will all be retrosetted (well in the case of Mirage finished) so they won't be included in Masters.  This also seems to imply that all the pre-Alliances sets will not be retrosetted."

Forgotten or purposefully ignored.  A fine line.

by JXClaytor at Mon, 09/03/2007 - 09:27
JXClaytor's picture

Did you read this?  I mean like actually sit down and see the part where the author wrote that he knew Master's Edition was pre Mirage? 

Of course maybe it would have been better to off to rename it something like what MTGO is missing, instead of Masters. 

Personally I think the article is fantastic. 

Responding to Claytor... by Javasci at Mon, 09/03/2007 - 13:22
Javasci's picture

No, I didn't read it, I read the first paragraph and skimmed the rest.  That's because he lost me as soon as he said Palinchron should have been in Master's, as I thought, ok here's another idiot who didn't read the information about Master's.

by Anonymous (Unregistered) 24.58.199.5 (not verified) at Mon, 09/03/2007 - 14:58
Anonymous (Unregistered) 24.58.199.5's picture

Feroz's Ban is online, in 7th edition.

by JXClaytor at Mon, 09/03/2007 - 21:43
JXClaytor's picture

Maybe you should have made it to the second paragraph than sweetheart?  Would it have been too hard to do that?  Maybe before you open your mouth you should actually read the article, than comment.  I think that would have been a lot better than you know, just opening your mouth in the first place. 

by Javasci at Mon, 09/03/2007 - 09:02
Javasci's picture

Why does everyone who posts something on what should've been in MED forget that MED is only pre-Mirage cards?!

by AJ_Impy at Mon, 09/03/2007 - 06:26
AJ_Impy's picture

I'm not entirely comfortable with the stereotypes. just shy of half the 'Vorthos' cards are already online, and I half expected 'Timmy' to choose an ante card to go with the dexterity and subgame cards. I strongly dislike the vulgar and cartoonish caricatures to which Timmy and Spike were distorted, but I recognise the writing for both to be internally consistent.

In Retrospect by Cashew at Mon, 09/03/2007 - 07:31
Cashew's picture

I wrote each section at different times in different moods.  I definitely character wrote them and tried to make it obvious.  Hence why everything is exaggeratted and even fonts/colors vary from part to part.  I probably made Timmy a tad too juvenille and may have gone a little too egotistical on Spike, but it was purposeful to drive home the point - as good comedy often does.

I did however model the characters after the most striking of people I found to be certain types.  The Vorthos came from two people who contirbuted to a top 10 list I was making a year ago.  I asked for one thing they gave me the opposite.  Gave me cards that weren't even in the set and although the topic was "sheer power" submitted some of the worst cards in their top 10, because of flavor.  I chose cards that were online purposefully as it was part of the overtop nature of my Vorthos take on artwork over function.

Spike in many essences came from the ridiculous player interviews I've read from pro-players.  I recently read one where it seemed like every player would answer things like "What is the best deck?"  with "Mine of course."  or "Obviously, mine."  Hence the verbose abuse of the word "obviously."  Which was probably more mentioned by the same players I mean to caricture. 

Timmy comes from every B-Net or goofy online player I've ever met.  Yes I've been macroed with crap even in Magic Online.  He was definitely borderline offensive and as you put it - I did almost choose a an ante card.  In the end, I went with the Naf's Asp rim-shot ending.  Had to be done.  I sadly laughed a lot while writing him and coming up with goofy things to put in there.

Johnny, I felt probably got the least over-the top treatment although hopefully the haughty attitude I wrote it with came thru somewhat.