The Accidental Player 19: The Topdeck Awards, "Outstanding Burn"

By: Kumagoro42, Gianluca Aicardi
Mar 21 2014 11:00am

I love this game. I love writing about it. Compiling lists about it. Evaluating it. Sometimes, I even play it. I'm an Accidental Player.

The Tolarian Academy of Arcane Arts and Pictures presents: THE TOPDECK AWARDS!
The best way to celebrate 20 long years of this silly game, by rewarding all those beloved cards that, at one point or another, starred in our personal tragicomedies and psychodramas.

Today's category: Outstanding Burn. A Burn Spell is any instant or sorcery that deals direct damage, either to players or other targets, as the main part of the spell. It can affect more than one target at once, like Comet Storm, but not all the defined targets at once, like Pyroclasm or Hurricane (which fall under the Board Sweeper category). The nominations are given by amount of damage and accompanied by a brief profile of the nominees, which are listed alphabetically. Winners will be published with the announcement of the next category. Last month's winners are here.

And the voting duty, ladies and gentlemen, is all yours.

> GO DIRECTLY TO THE BALLOTS <

> PREVIOUS CATEGORIES <

Category A: Outstanding 1-Damage Burn (aka "Outstanding Zap" – Zap not eligible)

The nominees are:

Name: Death Spark
Rarity: Uncommon
Birthdate: June 1996
Birthplace: Alliances
Reason for Nomination: Because you can always count on it to be back.

Name: Flame Jab
Rarity: Common
Birthdate: July 2008
Birthplace: Eventide
Reason for Nomination: Because it turns surplus lands into mini-burn.

Name: Geistflame
Rarity: Common
Birthdate: September 2011
Birthplace: Innistrad
Reason for Nomination: Because, unlike its grandfather Engulfing Flames, it's Modern-legal, so it actually sees some play.

Name: Gut Shot
Rarity: Uncommon
Birthdate: May 2011
Birthplace: New Phyrexia
Reason for Nomination: Because 0 mana is the best cost there is.

Name: Hornet Sting
Rarity: Common
Birthdate: July 2010
Birthplace: Magic 2011
Reason for Nomination: Because green shouldn't be allowed to do these things.

Name: Lava Dart
Rarity: Common
Birthdate: May 2002
Birthplace: Judgment
Reason for Nomination: Because it's a miniature Fireblast.

Name: Psychic Purge
Rarity: Common
Birthdate: June 1994
Birthplace: Legends
Reason for Nomination: Because, remember when blue was allowed to do these things?

Name: Puncture Bolt
Rarity: Common
Birthdate: May 2008
Birthplace: Shadowmoor
Reason for Nomination: Because it's much more than just 1 damage.

Name: Searing Blaze
Rarity: Common
Birthdate: February 2010
Birthplace: Worldwake
Reason for Nomination: Because it's any RDW player's best friend.

10.

Name: Searing Touch
Rarity: Uncommon
Birthdate: October 1997
Birthplace: Tempest
Reason for Nomination: Because it's a potentially endless source of small burn.

> GO TO THE BALLOTS <

Category B: Outstanding 2-Damage Burn (aka "Outstanding Shock" – Shock not eligible)

The nominees are:

Name: Electrolyze
Rarity: Uncommon
Birthdate: February 2006
Birthplace: Guildpact
Reason for Nomination: Because it's the best deal for its price.

Name: Fire/Ice
Rarity: Uncommon
Birthdate: June 2001
Birthplace: Apocalypse
Reason for Nomination: Because that blue side is a sweet thing to bring along.

Name: Firebolt
Rarity: Common
Birthdate: October 2001
Birthplace: Odyssey
Reason for Nomination: Because it's an old soldier that fought many, many battles.

Name: Magma Jet
Rarity: Uncommon
Birthdate: June 2004
Birthplace: Fifth Dawn
Reason for Nomination: Because scry is never not relevant.

Name: Magma Spray
Rarity: Common
Birthdate: October 2008
Birthplace: Shards of Alara
Reason for Nomination: Because it's Pillar of Flame's main rival for Kitchen Finks pest control.

Name: Pharika's Cure
Rarity: Common
Birthdate: September 2013
Birthplace: Theros
Reason for Nomination: Because, along with Sorin's Thirst, represent black's own take on the Shock concept.

Name: Pillar of Flame
Rarity: Common
Birthdate: May 2012
Birthplace: Avacyn Restored
Reason for Nomination: Because it's Magma Spray's main rival for Kitchen Finks pest control.

Name: Punishing Fire
Rarity: Uncommon
Birthdate: October 2009
Birthplace: Zendikar
Reason for Nomination: Because when paired with Grove of the Burnwillows, it really is punishing.

Name: Staggershock
Rarity: Common
Birthdate: April 2010
Birthplace: Rise of the Eldrazi
Reason for Nomination: Because two spells are better than one.

10.

Name: Sudden Shock
Rarity: Uncommon
Birthdate: October 2006
Birthplace: Time Spiral
Reason for Nomination: Because now you don't laugh anymore, uh, Pestermite?

Honorable Mentions: Arc Trail, because it can 2-for-1; Burst Lightning, because that kicker was relevant at some point; Electrostatic Bolt, because it's the bane of robots; Galvanic Blast, because it's the hero of robots; Righteous Blow, because it's the white Shock; Searing Blood, because it's adding injury to injury; Tarfire because it's a Goblin.

> GO TO THE BALLOTS <

Category C: Outstanding 3-Damage Burn (aka "Outstanding Bolt" – Lightning Bolt not eligible)

The nominees are:

Name: Arc Lightning
Rarity: Common
Birthdate: October 1998
Birthplace: (Urza's Saga)
Reason for Nomination: Because it's the original Split Bolt that even Chandra would end up copying.

Name: Chain Lightning
Rarity: Common
Birthdate: June 1994
Birthplace: Legends
Reason for Nomination: Because it's been Lightning Bolt #5-8 since 20 years.

Name: Hammer of Bogardan
Rarity: Rare
Birthdate: October 1996
Birthplace: Mirage
Reason for Nomination: Because there was an era when the good ol' Hammer was the scariest thing ever.

Name: Incinerate
Rarity: Common
Birthdate: June 1995
Birthplace: Ice Age
Reason for Nomination: Because it's still a mostly balanced burn staple.

Name: Lava Spike
Rarity: Common
Birthdate: October 2004
Birthplace: Champions of Kamigawa
Reason for Nomination: Because it's underwhelming everywhere, except in the archetype where it's outstanding.

Name: Leaf Arrow
Rarity: Common
Birthdate: April 2010
Birthplace: Rise of the Eldrazi
Reason for Nomination: Because even green can burn, if it hates something fiercely enough.

Name: Lightning Helix
Rarity: Uncommon
Birthdate: October 2005
Birthplace: Ravnica: City of Guilds
Reason for Nomination: Because Lightning Bolt + Healing Salve = profit.

Name: Shard Volley
Rarity: Common
Birthdate: February 2008
Birthplace: Morningtide
Reason for Nomination: Because you'd sacrifice anything to get another Lightning Bolt.

Name: Skullcrack
Rarity: Uncommon
Birthdate: February 2013
Birthplace: Gatecrash
Reason for Nomination: Because some decks really hate lifegaining.

10.

Name: Urza's Rage
Rarity: Rare
Birthdate: October 2000
Birthplace: Invasion
Reason for Nomination: Because back in the time, it taught Banefire how it's done.

Honorable Mentions: Ghostfire, because it trumps those pesky protected; Intimidation Bolt, because it scares away all those puny enemies; Puncture Blast, because wither is actually an amazing burn additive; Sunlance, because you never expect it from white; Thunderbolt, because it's actually sort of versatile; Volt Charge, because you might be willing to pay one mana more to get those counters; Volcanic Hammer, because it was the original Vanilla Bolt before Searing Spear and Lightning Strike.

> GO TO THE BALLOTS <

Category D: Outstanding 4-Damage Burn (aka "Outstanding Blast" – Lightning Blast not eligible)

The nominees are:

Name: Bituminous Blast
Rarity: Uncommon
Birthdate: April 2009
Birthplace: Alara Reborn
Reason for Nomination: Because cascade is always kind of a big deal.

Name: Char
Rarity: Rare
Birthdate: October 2005
Birthplace: Ravnica: City of Guilds
Reason for Nomination: Because it took them 12 years to realize Psionic Blast was in the wrong color.

Name: Fireblast
Rarity: Common
Birthdate: February 1997
Birthplace: Visions
Reason for Nomination: Because this has never, ever been paid its actual mana cost.

Name: Flame Javelin
Rarity: Uncommon
Birthdate: May 2008
Birthplace: Shadowmoor
Reason for Nomination: Because the hybrid mana gets you a discount on Lightning Blast.

Name: Flame Slash
Rarity: Common
Birthdate: April 2010
Birthplace: Rise of the Eldrazi
Reason for Nomination: Because it's bolting the unboltable since when it's been printed.

Name: Mizzium Mortars
Rarity: Rare
Birthdate: October 2012
Birthplace: Return to Ravnica
Reason for Nomination: Because in its plain form, it kills that angel; in its overloaded form, it kills all of them.

Name: Prophetic Bolt
Rarity: Rare
Birthdate: June 2001
Birthplace: Apocalypse
Reason for Nomination: Because sometimes you put it in your deck just for the bonus.

Name: Psionic Blast
Rarity: Uncommon
Birthdate: August 1993
Birthplace: Limited Edition Alpha
Reason for Nomination: Because it's always good to remember the way we were.

Name: Pyrokinesis
Rarity: Uncommon
Birthdate: June 1996
Birthplace: Alliances
Reason for Nomination: Because, remember how 0 mana is the good amount of mana?

10.

Name: Warleader's Helix
Rarity: Uncommon
Birthdate: May 2013
Birthplace: Dragon's Maze
Reason for Nomination: Because double the Lightning Helix, double the fun.

Honorable Mentions: Chandra's Outrage, because the outrage adds some collateral damage to the Blast; Flames of the Blood Hand, because it's a heavy weapon of choice in RDW's arsenal; Pyrotechnics, because it's functional and streamlined; Violent Eruption, because it takes great value from madness.

> GO TO THE BALLOTS <

Category E: Outstanding 5-Damage Burn

The nominees are:

Name: Beacon of Destruction
Rarity: Rare
Birthdate: June 2004
Birthplace: Fifth Dawn
Reason for Nomination: Because it's 5 damage for 5 mana, and it comes back.

Name: Combust
Rarity: Uncommon
Birthdate: July 2010
Birthplace: Magic 2011
Reason for Nomination: Because it's one of the best sideboard cards ever printed.

Name: Fated Conflagration
Rarity: Rare
Birthdate: February 2014
Birthplace: Born of the Gods
Reason for Nomination: Because even if it can't burn players, it can still burn planeswalkers; and scry makes everything better.

Name: Goblin Grenade
Rarity: Common
Birthdate: November 1994
Birthplace: Fallen Empires
Reason for Nomination: Because Goblin decks never miss the chance to do 5 damage for 1 mana.

Name: Lightning Axe
Rarity: Common
Birthdate: October 2006
Birthplace: Time Spiral
Reason for Nomination: Because if your battle plan involves discarding cards, you can do worse than killing stuff for 1 mana in the process.

Name: Shrapnel Blast
Rarity: Uncommon
Birthdate: October 2003
Birthplace: Mirrodin
Reason for Nomination: Because it's Goblin Grenade for robots.

Name: Thunderous Wrath
Rarity: Uncommon
Birthdate: May 2012
Birthplace: Avacyn Restored
Reason for Nomination: Because you gotta believe in miracles.

> GO TO THE BALLOTS <

Category F: Outstanding X-Damage Burn (aka "Outstanding Fireball" – Fireball not eligible)

The nominees are:

Name: Aurelia's Fury
Rarity: Mythic Rare
Birthdate: February 2013
Birthplace: Gatecrash
Reason for Nomination: Because they tried to get this effect right many times, but only Aurelia did it so well.

Name: Banefire
Rarity: Rare
Birthdate: February 2009
Birthplace: Conflux
Reason for Nomination: Because this spells "fatality!" like nothing else.

Name: Clan Defiance
Rarity: Rare
Birthdate: February 2013
Birthplace: Gatecrash
Reason for Nomination: Because when you manage to hit three targets while paying for one, you really feel defiant.

Name: Comet Storm
Rarity: Mythic Rare
Birthdate: February 2010
Birthplace: Worldwake
Reason for Nomination: Because this is the most cost-effective fireball ever printed; you just have to do the math.

Name: Consume Spirit
Rarity: Common
Birthdate: October 2003
Birthplace: Mirrodin
Reason for Nomination: Because this actually improved a classic like Drain Life.

Name: Corrupt
Rarity: Common
Birthdate: October 1998
Birthplace: Urza's Saga
Reason for Nomination: Because it makes the most ouf of your swamps.

Name: Devil's Play
Rarity: Rare
Birthdate: September 2011
Birthplace: Innistrad
Reason for Nomination: Because it's a Blaze with a smaller Blaze attached.

Name: Rakdos's Return
Rarity: Mythic Rare
Birthdate: October 2012
Birthplace: Return to Ravnica
Reason for Nomination: Because it's the very scary, X-rated Blightning.

Name: Red Sun's Zenith
Rarity: Rare
Birthdate: February 2011
Birthplace: Mirrodin Besieged
Reason for Nomination: Because it's the card that put Disintegrate out of business (give or take a regeneration).

10.

Name: Tribal Flames
Rarity: Common
Birthdate: October 2000
Birthplace: Invasion
Reason for Nomination: Because it challenges you to try and do 5 damage for 2. And you might.

Honorable Mentions: Death Grasp, because it's less iconic than Drain Life, but actually strictly better; Disintegrate, because it's obsolete now, but we'll always remember the first time we cast it; Fanning the Flames, because that buyback effect might be hard to pull off, but it's still a buyback effect; Flame Burst and Kindle, because their X might never get much high, but at least their cost is agile; Ghitu Fire, Heat Ray and Volcanic Geyser, because they tried to be relevant for 5 minutes; Swallowing Plague and Tendrils of Corruption for providing cheaper, limited version of Consume Spirit and Corrupt.

NOTE: Bonfire of the Damned is technically a sweeper.