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By: CottonRhetoric, Cotton Rhetoric
Feb 06 2019 12:00pm
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I've not only written two articles of trivia and puzzles (1, 2), I've written this, a third.

Do you have what it takes to save the universe? 

Find the Forgeries

Champagne glasses clink as you enter your friend's gala ball, confetti strewn on the lavishly decorated banquet tables. He's celebrating his crowning acquisition as a Magic collector: the original paintings of ten of the game's most iconic cards. Before you can congratulate him, ten butlers each pull back a red velvet curtain to reveal the paintings. Everyone present gasps in awe—except you, who immediately sense something amiss.

"One of these paintings is authentic," you say as you step forward and dramatically don a deerstalker hat, "but the other nine aren't worth the canvases they're printed on."

Your friend slaps you in the face. "You had better have a good reason for ruining tonight's festivities," he hisses through his clenched teeth.

"But I do," you say, looking back through the ten paintings once more to reassure yourself of what you noticed earlier. What do you say to prove that nine of these ten iconic paintings are frauds?

  

  

  

  

  

Cards depicted: Ancestral Recall, Birds of Paradise, Clone, Dark Ritual, Gaea's Liege,
Glimmervoid, Mox Jet, Mox Pearl, Timetwister, White Knight

(Solutions to all puzzles are the the bottom.)

 

Abundant Abilities

Lim-Dûl's Paladin, from 1996's Alliances, boasted eleven lines of convoluted rules text in a very small font. Chunks of it have been removed here; what did the rest say? (The templating has been updated to reflect the current Oracle wording. Sorry, fans of "bury.")

1)

a. Trample
b. First strike
c. Haste
d. Shadow

2) At the beginning of your upkeep,

a. pay BBB.
b. tap all other creatures you control.
c. discard a card.
d. sacrifice an Island.

3) If you don't, sacrifice Lim-Dûl's Paladin and

a. lose 4 life.
b. discard your hand.
c. draw a card.
d. put the top 5 cards of your library into your graveyard.

4) Whenever Lim-Dûl's Paladin becomes blocked,

a. it gets +6/+3 until end of turn.
b. gain control of all creatures blocking it.
c. defending player discards a card and you draw a card.
d. exile all blocking creatures. Their controller puts that many 1/1 black Snake creature tokens onto the battlefield.

5) Whenever Lim-Dûl's Paladin attacks and isn't blocked, it assigns no combat damage this turn and

a. you search your library for a black or red legendary creature card and put it onto the battlefield.
b. defending player loses 4 life.
c. you gain control of target noncreature permanent.
d. you may cast a card in defending player's graveyard without paying its mana cost.

And you thought Thousand Year Storm was complicated!

 

Tool Song or Magic Card?

Magic begins with an M. Metal begins with an M. Can you tell which of the titles in this list are Magic cards and which are song titles from the 90s band Tool? There are 9 of each, plus 3 that are both.

1. Center Soul
2. Crawl Away
3. Disgustipated
4. Flood
5. Grudge Keeper
6. Hatred
7. Hush
8. Intermission
9. Intolerance
10. Living Wall
11. Mantra
12. Reflection
13. Schism
14. Shadow Rift
15. Soul Echo
16. Swamp Song
17. Terminus
18. Third Eye
19. Torture
20. Transcendence
21. Undertow

Spelling Bee

Magic has some hard to spell card titles! Which eight of these are misspelled, and which four are correct?

1. Akron Legionaire (Legends)
2. Boseiju, Who Shelters All (CoK)
3. Guilded Lotus (Mirrodin)
4. Goblin Chirugeon (Fallen Empires)
5. Honed Khopesh (Amonkhet)
6. Imperious Prefect (Lorwyn)
7. Lhurgoyf (Ice Age)
8. Merseinne (Fallen Empires)
9. Shaharzad (Arabian Nights)
10. Tunnel Ingus (Scars of Mirrodin)
11. Vedalken Orrery (Fifth Dawn)
12. Zzzyxas' Abyss (Unhinged)

 

 Spellbook

 

—♦— Solutions —♦—

Find the Forgeries

You put out your cigar on your friend's lapel. "For you see, the gentleman in Ancestral Recall has the wrong color shirt; Birds of Paradise bears Richard Kane Ferguson's ostentatious signature rather than the delicate, reserved scription of Mark Poole; the bottoms of the swords are missing from Clone; there is a brick missing in Dark Ritual; the forger has failed to preserve the odd black dots in the corner of Gaea's Liege; Mox Jet was given the background of Mox Ruby; Mox Pearl's shadow is on the wrong side; and there should not be birds in the background of White Knight."

He anxiously checks the art in your hyperlinks. "My stars, you're right! But what of the remaining two paintings, Glimmervoid and Timetwister? Which is authentic and which the fraud?"

"Both appear flawless, you'll find. However, Glimmervoid is clearly digital art and thus was never a painting in the first place, so this cannot be the original. Only Timetwister is authentic. You do have one valuable piece in your collection, but you no doubt lost more than its worth acquiring the other nine."

He breaks down crying as he clutches your shoulders. "Can you ever forgive me for slapping you?"

You brush him to the floor, knock over his wine rack, and head for the exit. "Some offenses are unforgivable."

 

Abundant Abilities

1A ♦ 2C ♦ 3C ♦ 4A ♦ 5B

 

Tool Song or Magic Card?

Magic cards are black; Tool songs are Red; both are blue.

1. Center Soul
2. Crawl Away
3. Disgustipated
4. Flood
5. Grudge Keeper
6. Hatred
7. Hush
8. Intermission
9. Intolerance
10. Living Wall
11.
Mantra
12. Reflection
13. Schism
14. Shadow Rift
15. Soul Echo
16. Swamp Song
17. Terminus
18. Third Eye
19. Torture
20. Transcendence
21.
Undertow

You can ask my brother to confirm: back in high school, I had a section in my not-for-trade binder containing Hush, Undertow, and Flood. I thought I was very cool. And was right. \m/

 

Spelling Bee

The four correct titles are italicized. The incorrect titles have been fixed, with the relevant part underlined and bolded.

1. Akron Legionnaire
2. Boseiju, Who Shelters All
3. Gilded Lotus
4. Goblin Chirurgeon
5. Honed Khopesh
6. Imperious Perfect
7. Lhurgoyf
8. Merseine
9. Shahrazad
10. Tunnel Ignus
11. Vedalken Orrery
12. Zzzyxas's Abyss

 

11 Comments

These puzzles are works of by Paul Leicht at Thu, 02/07/2019 - 00:34
Paul Leicht's picture
5

These puzzles are works of art. Not at all counterfeit.

Unfortunately my autocarding by stsung at Thu, 02/07/2019 - 07:43
stsung's picture
5

Unfortunately my autocarding thingy revealed the correct answers to me already and I couldn't unsee that but I tried and it was fun^_^. I didn't know why the only not counterfeit painting felt right, only after I read the solution I had to go back and check.

Good job on these!

i didn't run the autocard by JXClaytor at Thu, 02/07/2019 - 08:19
JXClaytor's picture

i didn't run the autocard tool on this :/

it runs on my computer. that by stsung at Thu, 02/07/2019 - 10:12
stsung's picture

it runs on my computer. that comment wasn't supposed to offend anyone, I keep the script on since there are only very rare cases in which I should turn it off. I still had fun with these puzzles though. It doesn't changed the fact that 'destroy all enchantments' card is one of the cards I wouldn't have guessed, etc.

lol, of course, I was just by JXClaytor at Thu, 02/07/2019 - 10:18
JXClaytor's picture

lol, of course, I was just like, oh crap, I didn't run it, why is it happening for you :D

Magic cards are a good way to by Kumagoro42 at Fri, 02/08/2019 - 05:01
Kumagoro42's picture
5

Magic cards are a good way to remember that the Saxon genitive always requires to follow the apostrophe with an "s" for singular nouns, even if they end in "s" themselves. Mons's Goblin Raiders, Tawnos's Coffin, Rakdos's Return, Rhonas's Monument, In Bolas's Clutches.

The way that rule was by CottonRhetoric at Fri, 02/08/2019 - 07:36
CottonRhetoric's picture

The way that rule was described to me back in my copyediting days was, either formation can be considered correct, as long as you're consistent. I looked it up just now to confirm, and I saw multiple sites insisting on either side.

As a non-native speaker, I by Kumagoro42 at Fri, 02/08/2019 - 09:33
Kumagoro42's picture

As a non-native speaker, I tend to be more rigid with my English rules, because otherwise I'll end up making a mess. So I strictly follow a few sources (and yeah, Wizards of the Coast is one of them! Easy to do it with something I have in front of my eyes daily).

I checked this specific case, Wikipedia has a couple pages/sections devoted to the argument: this one and this one. In short, I'm with The Chicago Manual of Style, The Guardian, and the majority of the Supreme Court. The sources that differ do it mostly for phonetic reasons, which are more likely to be outside of my direct experience. (Also, etymologically, what we're doing is not adding an "s" at the end; the apostrophe marks the absence of a letter that was part of the Proto-English's Latin-based genitive case. Like, "of James" => "Jamesis" => "James's". So it makes more sense to me to put an apostrophe in place of a single letter, not two).

Fair! But if you ever get by CottonRhetoric at Fri, 02/08/2019 - 11:34
CottonRhetoric's picture

Fair!

But if you ever get hired by a newspaper or magazine etc., double check what their particular style guide asks for, haha.

I know I am a fraud, you all by JXClaytor at Fri, 02/08/2019 - 11:36
JXClaytor's picture

I know I am a fraud, you all don't have to show it off for everyone else :(

Counterargument, you empower by CottonRhetoric at Fri, 02/08/2019 - 17:40
CottonRhetoric's picture

Counterargument, you empower your writers by providing them with choice.