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By: CottonRhetoric, Cotton Rhetoric
May 15 2013 11:22pm
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Legends was known, of course, for its legends. 55 of them total. They were not only Magic's first 55 legendary creatures (a category now with nearly 500 entrants), but also Magic's first 55 multicolored cards (almost 1200 of those now)!  The gold frame was new and exciting. The large bodies and bizarre abilities added to their allure.

But then 19 years of power creep took their effect, and the Legends legends were, sadly, a little outclassed. But like many (usually older) players, I still love these creatures! So as a fun experiment, I will rebalance each of these cards according to today's standards, as if they were mythics.

This may involve:

  • lowering the cc
  • raising the p/t
  • adding abilities
  • changing the existing abilities

...but the colors and premises will always stay the same.

Also, I'm going to be skipping the 11 (!) vanilla legends in the set. There's only so much you can do with those.

Adun Oakenshield    

Adun Oakenshield

New version:

BRG
1/2
2: Return target creature from your graveyard to the battlefield.

(Note the lack of a tap sign.)

       
Angus Mackenzie    

Angus Mackenzie

New version:

GWU
2/2
Prevent all combat damage that would be dealt by opponents' creatures.

       
Arcades Sabboth    

Arcades Sabboth

New version:

GGWWUU
7/7
Flying
Other creatures you control get +2/+2.

(All five Elder Dragons will cost 6 colored mana and have their upkeep removed.)

       
Axelrod Gunnarson    

Axelrod Gunnarson

New version:

1BBRR
5/5
Trample
Whenever a creature dies, you gain 2 life and each opponent loses 2 life.
 

       
   

Ayesha Tanaka

New version:

UW
2/2
Activated abilities of artifacts can't be activated.

(Yeah, another hate bear! A walking Null Rod!)

       
Bartel Runeaxe    

Bartel Runeaxe

New version:

3BRG
6/5
Vigilance, trample, protection from noncreatures

       
Boris Devilboon    

Boris Devilboon

New version:

1BR
2/2
At the beginning of your end step, put a 2/2 black and red Demon token onto the battlefield.

       
Chromium    

Chromium

New version:

BBUUWW
7/7
Flying, rampage 14
All creatures able to block Chromium must do so.

(...Still probably the worst Elder Dragon.)

       
Dakkon Blackblade    

Dakkon Blackblade

New version:

WUUB
*/*
Dakkon Blackblade's power and toughness are each equal to the number of lands you control.
When Dakkon Blackblade attacks, gain control of target land.

       
Gabriel Angelfire    

Gabriel Angelfire

New version:

1GGWW
4/4
At the beginning of your combat phase, choose two—intimidate, trample, haste, hexproof, indestructible. Gabriel Angelfire gains these abilities until the beginning of your next combat phase.
 

       
   

Gosta Dirk

New version:

WWUU
4/4
Your opponents' creatures lose flying. Your creatures have flying.
 

       
Gwendlyn Di Corci    

Gwendlyn Di Corci

New version:

UBBR
3/5
At the beginning of your end step, each other player discards a card at random.
 

       
Halfdane    

Halfdane

New version:

1WUB
3/3
At the beginning of each upkeep, you may change Halfdane's power and toughness to the combined power and toughness of every other creature on the battlefield.
 

       
Hazezon Tamar    

Hazezon Tamar

New version:

4RGW
2/7
When Hazezon Tamar enters the battlefield, search your library for three land cards and put them onto the battlefield.
T: Put X 1/1 Sand Warrior creature tokens onto the battlefield, where X is the number of lands you control.
 

       
Hunding Gjornersen    

Hunding Gjornersen

New version:

2UUW
5/4
When Hunding Gjornersen is blocked, exile all creatures blocking it.

       
Jacques le Vert    

Jacques le Vert

New version:

1RGW
3/4
Other creatures you control get +0/+2.
Creatures your opponents control get -2/-0.

       
   

Johan

New version:

2WGR
5/4
Creatures you control have vigilance and haste.

       
Kei Takahashi    

Kei Takahashi

New version:

1GW
2/2
If a source would deal damage to you or a creature you contol, reduce it by 2. 

       
Lady Caleria    

Lady Caleria

New version:

1GGWW
3/6
Vigilance
T: Deal 3 damage to each creature controlled by target player. 

       
Lady Evangela     

Lady Evangela

New version:

WUB
3/3
Haste
T: Put a peace counter on target creature. It gains "This creature deals no damage during combat."

       
Livonya Silone     

Livonya Silone

New version:

RRGG
4/4
Haste, nonbasic landwalk

       
     

Lord Magnus

New version:

1WWG
5/3
First strike
Creatures not controlled by you lose all abilities. 

       
Marhault Elsdragon     

Marhault Elsdragon

New version:

3RRG
4/6
Trample
Marhault Elsdragon must be blocked if able.
For each creature blocking Marhault Elsdragon, it gains +4/+4.
 

       
Nebuchadnezzar     

Nebuchadnezzar

New version:

2UB
3/3
XT: Target opponent reveals X cards in their hand and you choose one of them. Exile that card, and at the beginning of your next turn you may cast it without paying its cost.

       
Nicol Bolas     

Nicol Bolas

New version:

UUBBRR
7/7
Flying
When Nicol Bolas deals combat damage, target player discards their hand and you draw that many cards.

       
Palladia-Mors    

Palladia-Mors

New version:

RRGGWW
7/7
Flying, trample
When Palladia-Mors deals combat damage to a player, that player exiles that many permanents they control.

       
Pavel Maliki     

Pavel Maliki

New version:

4BR
5/5
When Pavel Maliki attacks, double its power. (This effect lasts indefinitely.)

       
Princess Lucrezia     

Princess Lucrezia

New version:

2UUB
5/4
At the beginning of your post-combat main phase, add UUB to your mana pool.

       
Ragnar     

Ragnar

New version:

GWU
3/2
Vigilance
T: Target creature is indestructible until end of turn.

       
Ramirez DePietro    

Ramirez DePietro

New version:

3UBB
4/3
First strike
When Ramirez DePietro deals combat damage, gain control of target permanent.
 

(He is a pirate, after all.)

       
Ramses Overdark     

Ramses Overdark

New version:

1BBUU
4/3
3: Destroy target enchanted creature.
T: Search your library for an Aura card with "enchant creature" and attach it to target creature an opponent controls.

       
Rasputin Dreamweaver     

Rasputin Dreamweaver

New version:

4WU
4/7
Vigilance
T: add 7 to your mana pool.
 

       
Riven Turnbull     

Riven Turnbull

New version:

4UB
5/7
When Riven Turnbull enters the battlefield, search your library for up to five Swamp or Island cards and put them onto the battlefield.

       
Rohgahh of Kher Keep     

Rohgahh of Kher Keep

New version:

2BBRR
5/5
When Rohgahh of Kher Keep enters the battlefield, search your library for any number of Kobold cards and put them onto the battlefield.
Other Kobold creatures get +3/+3.

(He could win the game easily, but the downside is you have to play all those kobolds in your deck. Still probably not worth it.)

       
Rubinia Soulsinger     

Rubinia Soulsinger

New version:

2GWU
2/3
At the beginning of your upkeep, gain control of target creature.

       
Sol'kanar the Swamp King     

Sol'kanar the Swamp King

New version:

2UBR
5/5
Unblockable
When a black spell is cast, gain 1 life and draw a card.

       
Stangg     

Stangg

New version:

4RG
4/4
When Stangg enters the battlefield, put two 4/4 red and green Human Warrior creature tokens named Stangg Triplet onto the battlefield.

       
Sunastian Falconer     

Sunastian Falconer

New version:

3RG
4/4
T: For each basic land you control, search your library for a basic land and put it onto the battlefield tapped.

       
Tetsuo Umezawa     

Tetsuo Umezawa

New version:

UBR
3/3
If a creature taps or blocks, you may pay 3. If you do, destroy it.

       
Tor Wauki    

Tor Wauki

New version:

2BBR
3/4
T: Deal 3 damage to target creature or player, 4 damage to another target creature or player, and 5 damage to a third target creature or player.


(If there are only two good targets in play, remember that he has enough toughness to survive being the first target himself.)

       
Tuknir Deathlock    

Tuknir Deathlock

New version:

RRGG
Flying
2/2
When Tuknir Deathlock attacks or blocks, up to two target creatures gain +2/+2 and trample until end of turn.

       
   

Ur-Drago

New version:

BBUU
4/4
First strike, vigilance
T: Target attacking creature becomes blocked.
 

       
Vaevictis Asmadi    

Vaevictis Asmadi

New version:

BBRRGG
7/7
Flying
1: Vaevictis Asmadi gets +2/+0 until end of turn. Target creature gets -2/-0 until end of turn.

       
Xira Arien    

Xira Arien

New version:

BRG
Flying, vigilance
1/5
T: Draw two cards.

 

That was fun!

In fact, it was so fun that as a bonus I'll do the vanilla legends after all. I think I found some ways to make them interesting....

 


 

Bonus! The Vanilla Legends

 

Jasmine Boreal    

Jasmine Boreal

New version:

1GW
4/5
 

       
Tobias Andrion    

Tobias Andrion

New version:

3WU
4/4
Flying, lifelink, double strike
 

       
Jerrard of the Closed Fist    

Jerrard of the Closed Fist

New version:

3RGG
20/20

       
   

Kasimir the Lone Wolf

New version:

4UW
5/3
Cascade, cascade, cascade, cascade, cascade, cascade

       
Sir Shandlar of Eberyn    

Sir Shandlar of Eberyn

New version:

4GW
4/7
Haste, annihilator 12, protection from everything

       
The Lady of the Mountain    

The Lady of the Mountain

New version:

4RG
5/5
When The Lady of the Mountain enters the battlefield, search your library for 7 mountains and a card named Valakut, the Molten Pinnacle and put them onto the battlefield.

       
Torsten Von Ursus    

Torsten Von Ursus

New version:

3GGW
5/5
T: Gain control of target library. (You may draw cards from it, and its owner has no library to draw from anymore.)

       
Barktooth Warbeard    

Barktooth Warbeard

New version:

4BRR
6/5
T: Gain ownership of all permanents. (This effect continues after the game is over.)

       
Jedit Ojanen    

Jedit Ojanen

New version:

4WWU
5 loyalty
+2: Put a 5/5 blue and white Cat Warrior token onto the battlefield.
+0: Take an extra turn.
-6: Take... two extra turns.

       
Lady Orca    

Lady Orca

New version:

5BR
7/4
Absorb, amplify, aura swap, buyback, champion, cipher, clash, conspire, delve, devour, epic, fateseal, level up, madness, offering, pizzazz, prowl, retrace, soulbond, storm
 

       
Sivitri Scarzam    

Sivitri Scarzam

New version:

5UB
6/4
T: Just win the game ok

 

When is the next Great Designer Search anyway?

 

11 Comments

You didn't respect the by Kumagoro42 at Thu, 05/16/2013 - 06:20
Kumagoro42's picture
5

You didn't respect the premise of Gabriel Angelfire, which is that Gabriel Angelfire is inept and dim-witted. Just look at the art: he's sitting on his ass and doesn't have a clue how to handle that sword (he's probably going to try and eat it). That's what you get for being a male Angel.

Your Hazezon Tamar is over the top. Fetching any 3 lands untapped just spells "you win the game".

On the other hand, you made Rasputin worse! Rasputin's strength, especially in Commander, is that he gives you 7 mana the turn he comes into play (cue shenanigans). Giving him summoning sickness makes him nearly useless.

"double its power. (This effect lasts indefinitely.)"
C'mon, you know this one should be worded "add X +1/+0 counters, where X is its power". :)
(Except you shouldn't use counters that aren't +1/+1).

I must be missing part of the by CottonRhetoric at Thu, 05/16/2013 - 19:19
CottonRhetoric's picture

I must be missing part of the Rasputin combo. Surely the idea isn't to pay six and then get seven on the same turn? Seems like a waste.

Since when you need to by Kumagoro42 at Thu, 05/16/2013 - 21:38
Kumagoro42's picture

Since when you need to hardcast a creature to have it on the battlefield? But even in Commander, you hardcast it, take 7, blink it, take 7, recur the blinker, cast Doubling Season, take 14...

(Ask Leviathan below, I learned this from one of his old articles :)

Doubling Season doesn't let by axehurdle at Fri, 05/17/2013 - 02:19
axehurdle's picture

Doubling Season doesn't let you get 14 because Rasputin can only have 7 counters on him.

I like that you gave Lady by Leviathan at Thu, 05/16/2013 - 13:15
Leviathan's picture
5

I like that you gave Lady Orca "pizzazz"! At first I thought it was pizza. But who couldn't use a little bit of flair in their life?

Chromium still sucks though. You'd need Mystic Decree, Nemesis Mask and Loxodon Warhammer to go really nuts.

I like how with each of the others you didn't even try to be fair. Good commentary on power creep.

I lol'd. Simply, that is all. by 3drinks at Thu, 05/16/2013 - 14:58
3drinks's picture

I lol'd. Simply, that is all.

.... by Adam_the_Mentat at Sun, 05/19/2013 - 16:55
Adam_the_Mentat's picture
1

I'm not sure what to say. There's power increase and then there's power increase. Gain control of target library? are you mad? The only way that'd fly on a magic card is if it was an ultimate ability of a planeswalker, that took shenanigans to achieve.

Lady Caldera is terrible. They would never allow white and green to do damage outright. They might allow a Brigid type thing of 3 to each attacking or blocking. I know that perhaps you intended this to be a joke article, but your intentional overabused unfairness of mythic-ness is lost by the fog of anger for how you completely, and without any nod to the color pie, go over the top.

The only thing you could have "updated" a textbox with that could cranky up magic players even more is if you had one that said T: Start playing Yu-Gi-Oh.

I try to never, ever be negative in my life. I try to never give negative criticism, and I've never found a huge issue with any other article on PureMTGO, your artcles inclusive... except this one is just terrible. I feel like you spent twelve whole minutes making the article, and after reading it all I feel is anger for how ridiculous it is and jaded that you got paid for it and I wasted my time reading it.

Imho your commentary here is by Paul Leicht at Sun, 05/19/2013 - 17:29
Paul Leicht's picture

Imho your commentary here is more about your mood than how bad/good Cotton's article is.

For the record I felt it was funny if clearly not ready for prime time. Cotton's sense of humor might have escaped you. This doesn't make his article bad. Just didn't hit the right spot for YOU.

I am surprised really at the vehemence of your reaction as in the past you have shown a sense of humor on par with this as far as I can remember. Maybe my memory has degraded a bit, but really what is over top here is your commentary.

settle down Paul by Adam_the_Mentat at Thu, 05/23/2013 - 08:36
Adam_the_Mentat's picture

My commentary isn't over the top. I apologized for being negative, but guess what? Not all commentary has to be positive. Sometimes, even if its hard to hear, you have to receive negative criticism.

No I don't understand Cotton's humor. I am not suggesting that every article needs to be a masterpece or that everyone needs to put in the effort I do, but when I look at an article on a website, I expect it to be an article, not a handful of sentances of "updated card" humor that look like Cotton took five minutes on a public bus to write out.

I never said someone kicked my puppy or stole the jam from my donut, so I didn't come into this article in a negative headspace. I am also not capitalizing words when addressing you Paul. Tone can be conveyed through comments, and you are obviously pissy that I found something that you find funny to not be so. Moreover I felt the artcle was a wate of my time, and no offense to the author, I felt I should share my honest and forthright feelings about it. It's funny to me that he didn't respond to it all angrily, only you did.

So now I know not to read Cotton's articles. That's all.

If you want to talk about articles that don't do "it" for me, we're talking your articles. I don't care abotu your visits to parents or your back hurting. If I wantecd to find out person info from you I'd engage you in convo. If I want to read a Magic article about Magic, I got to pureMTGO.com to read articles. I never commented on your articles expressing my disapproval before, but since you attacked me all with your snippypants on, there it is.

But all jokes aside I think by CottonRhetoric at Sun, 05/19/2013 - 18:01
CottonRhetoric's picture

But all jokes aside I think my last few cards would be pretty good in the current meta

I have to say that I agree by Misterpid at Thu, 05/23/2013 - 09:16
Misterpid's picture

I have to say that I agree with Adam here. I understand where Cotton is coming from with these articles - both the card updates and his lists. But to me they just come off as something that's better left as message board material rather than as actual articles that someone is getting compensated for.